Transitions – I have been thinking a lot about them this week. With the changing of the seasons, it is hard not to. We have been doing a lot of transitioning lately, some has been hard, some not so hard. It is just hard when so many seem to be happening all at the same time. Ultimately I know that these are changes that most people go through and that they will all be for good. I just needed a few moments of reflection on some of them.
The most obvious and biggest transition for us is that Sarah is now going to school 5 days a week from 9:30 to 2:30. She absolutely loves it. She runs into her classroom each morning and sits down at the table to do puzzles or whatever table time activity they may be doing that day. She is so anxious to get started most mornings that she runs in and sits down without taking her backpack off. I stand in the door and remind her to go hang it up. She gets so engrossed with her activity that sometimes she doesn't even look up as I leave. This has left me with mixed emotions. For one thing, she has always been like this. She has never been a clingy child, much to my shgrin, but this is the first time that she has ever been away from me for so long. I sometimes wish she would just miss me a little bit more. On the other hand, it fills me with such joy and amazement at how well she is doing in school. She is certainly thriving and she never ceases to amaze me. She is making friends and learning new things all the time. She is going to be ready for kindergarten with no problems. She is so confident, she just runs into new situations full steam ahead. It fills me awe and I'm so incredibly proud of her. She could just miss me a little bit more.
Because of Sarah's new school schedule, another transition is that I am spending a lot more one on one with Emma. Although Em really misses Sarah sometimes I think that Emma is really thriving too. We have been going to the playground, the library, story time at the mall and at the end of October we start a Mommy and Me gymnastics class. I'm having a lot of fun being with her and doing these things. I wasn't really able to do many of these things with Sarah because we already had Emma. It is a bit lonelier that it was with Sarah though because she had a strong playgroup. I see Emma's confidence building as she starts to participate in the activities. She is talking a lot more and she also amazes me on a daily basis. We are working on potty training, so hopefully soon we will not have any diapers left in the house. And very soon we are going to take down the crib and get Em a big girl bed.
My girls have transitioned from being babies and toddlers into 2 big girls. No more babies around here, so we have been starting to give away baby things. When I first gave away a bin of 0-3m clothes, I cried and cried. Seth and I talked and talked about it and we both decided that our family was complete now. I love our life and yet I still feel a twinge when I see a little baby. I think about our baby that never was and how different our lives would be if he had lived. As hard as my pregnancies were, I really loved being pregnant and I loved having a little baby around. I know that I can't keep everything forever, we don't have the storage space and I know other people can put it all to good use. This transition has been especially hard for me, but we have given away the maternity clothes, the exersaucer, swings and bouncy seats. The last item we just gave away was our double stroller and the bucket car seat. We have transitioned out of baby mode and now have room for the big girl bikes and scooters and anything else they might get into.
Giving away these things is really what got me started thinking about all the changes that are going on right now. It is what made me realize that my girls are really growing up now. I no longer have toddlers in our house. I love our life. I love watching the girls play together and I love that they can walk and don't need to be carried all the time. Can't wait for Emma to be really potty trained, so no more diapers. This is such an exciting time with the girls, they are at such an amazing stage of life and I want to give them the best. I'm so proud to be their mother. They are 2 exceptional little girls and I can't wait to see what they do next.
These changes keep us moving forward and making our family better and stronger. I'm sure that next fall I will have more anxiety about the next set of transitions. Sarah will be going to kindergarten and Em will start pre-school. And who knows what I will end up doing. That is what is exciting about transitions, you never quite know what is going to happen. Life is good!!